Dear Mrs. Web Personal Advice Column -- Welcome!

Dear Mrs. Web,

My son's wedding is next month. I am not very happy about it. He and his fiancée have been living together for three years. She is very rude and disrespectful to my husband and me.

They never visit us on holidays and now this girl is angry with me for not helping with her wedding plans. I told her I just could not understand why we were celebrating a wedding when the marriage began three years ago. I also told her that I could not compromise my morals and values to be happy for her. She became very angry and yelled at me. I just don't understand her, she wants a huge wedding. Now, she is asking us to pay for the alcohol for the wedding and help with the seating chart - I am not even going to call her back - why should we help?

This wedding is ridiculous. She has asked my daughters to be in the wedding party and now I have to deal with that as well. My son never calls me any more and she has come between us.. I am angry and think they need to rethink their morals. My son does seem happy, but I am not - what should I do?

This is your son and his future wife. This is the woman he has chosen. By your actions during this time you will determine what kind of future you will have with your son, his wife and your future grandchildren. If you disagreed with the moral footing that began the relationship you should have addressed it with your son three years ago. Dear Mrs. Web assumes that this young woman did not leash your son against his will and force him to sleep with her. Although nothing surprises Dear Mrs. Web these days (big sigh).

Stop attacking your soon-to-be daughter-in-law.

The groom’s family traditionally pays for the rehearsal dinner. Apparently your son and his future wife have other ideas. I would sit down with your son and discuss politely and with grace what you will do to help them in this wedding.

Don’t blow up your family because things are not going your way. It is not your job to be happy. It is your job to be polite, helpful, pleasant, and considerate about this wedding. Bite your tongue and call your future daughter-in-law about the seating charts.

Dear Mrs. Web,

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